Wisdom from The Fairies and Me

Posts tagged ‘channel’

Trust Me Trust You

I had an epiphany a few days ago about the last five to six years of my life. I had a moment five and a half years ago when I realized my marriage had fallen apart and it was time for me to leave it. I had been with my then husband for almost 10 years and we had two children. This moment was both freeing and terrifying. The events that unfurled from that moment over the last almost six years have left me completely changed. Every time I thought I knew why something was happening or where I was going the path seemed to dissolve in front of me. Once I surrendered the next step would reveal itself and I would start trying to figure it out again and then have it dissolve again. I had perceived this as my struggle with ego and confidence or control and surrender. In some ways it was that but it was also my fear. I have a fear of being myself and claiming my life. Many would think I do that. I seem strong, resilient, stubborn, and intense. I am all those things but I am also afraid. I fear success as much as I fear failure. Mostly I am afraid of the unknown. The true clarity of this came to me last week, not as a thought but as a feeling. Often my greatest epiphanies come to me as feelings not rational thoughts. This feeling was trust. If I could just trust I wouldn’t have to be afraid. I had to trust my body, my universe, my family, my friends, the environment, my government, and especially my guides. There was a time I had felt this. I was very young. When I was 4 I was invincible. My 4 year old self would take on the world. Slowly I started to lose that trust. People betrayed me, I was hurt, and life happened. I experienced a lot of challenges in a very short time. By the time I was 18 I felt pretty broken but I stilled trusted some things. I had put a lot of faith in love. If I couldn’t trust my heart and love, what could I trust? Well, my first husband help shatter that too. The funny thing is the last five years, in which I have felt the most alone and broken, has been my rebuilding of trust. I now trust myself, my gut, and my intuition more profoundly then I ever thought I could, AND I know that this will only deepen.
I could spend my day freaking out about my finances and how there isn’t enough to cover my bills. I could choose to stress over any issues I perceive my children to be experiencing, or over the way my ex-husband is behaving, or what someone else did. I could beat myself over my weight or my health or worry about my grandfather who keeps dancing on the edge of death and health. I could get so angry about my husband and the fact that he didn’t do the dishes or the laundry. I could cry victim and blame the world for my choices. Believe me, I could do all these things and do them so magnificently you stood there in awe. Today I choose differently. I choose to trust. I trust that when I feel the struggle and things don’t go as I wish it is still for my highest and best; that, no matter what, my reality is being created to fulfill me.
We all have challenges in our lives. Everyone knows this but it is hard to always feel it. We can sit there and assume everyone else is feeling free, having fun, secure, happy, rich, healthy, and fully enlightened, but that is not the truth. That is our fear screaming inside us to break our trust. When we have an experience of the mind comparing our hurt to someone else’s appearance then our fear is working to separate us. When we are separate then we do not trust. I invite you to trust right now. Trust that you are lovable right now as you are. Trust that your body is perfect and any dis-ease you are experiencing is there to open communication with you and your body. Trust that your finances are an ever changing flow and there will always be more and there will be times of less. Trust that the Universe is conspiring for your highest good, your greatest joy, and your deepest experiences. Any pain you are experience is there to remind you to open, release, and receive more love. Trust in yourself.

This is the Intermission

I have been personally feeling what I describe as a “push/pull” energy. I can feel, see, know, of amazing things on the horizon but can’t seem to touch, shift, or move towards those things. I feel overwhelmed by a to-do list that never seems to get done and keep burning the candle at both ends. It seems I am overwhelmingly busy and yet not getting anything accomplished. I thought this had to do with my personal “stuff” (which it does) but I noticed a lot of other people having similar experiences and expressing their discomfort in it. It can feel like, or even be, the next big step is right there and you want to take it but circumstances outside yourself are keeping you from moving forward. Even this blog, I had wanted to write but it took me running myself into the ground and getting sick to finally sit down and do it. This is an old pattern of mine I thought I had let go of. This is another part of the energy right now. Experiencing the past, be it people, places, or old cycles. I am having moments when I can smell the house I use to live in, relive a memory I thought was lost to time, and interact with people I thought I would never see again. I asked the Fairies for information about this and how to be more balanced in it. Here is what they had to say:

“You are in the intermission. Act 1 of 2012 has finished and Act 2 is about to begin but you need to rest so you can give Act 2 your full attention and intention.”
“Is Act 2 in 2013?” I asked
“It is a little different for everyone. Some started Act 2 this week, some still have a month or two before the overture starts. Others may not even notice when it does start, but we would suggest that this not be the case for you. We wish you all to be very aware of this rest time and the beginning. There will be lots of foreshadowing in these beginning stages, glints of the future, inspiration that will be buried and then bloom later. Please pay close attention to passing thoughts, visions, and dreams.”
“You talked about an intermission. How do we find peace or what should we be focusing on during this intermission?” I asked
“The intermission can feel uneasy and chaotic to some. Everyone is running around doing little things but feeling stuck. Take this time to breathe, relax, get your food (the things that feed you), and release what has been pressing on you. Get yourself to a place of feeling like you can sit and focus on the next big thing. This is a time to tie up loose ends and finish unfinished business. Very soon you will hear the first note of the band calling you back to your spot.”
“So, what I am hearing you say, is more of the surrender and acceptance which is always my personal issue.” I said
“Yes but also it is about being gentle with you. Letting go of your judgments and criticisms about yourself. Take care of your physical needs and allow yourself to rest or play or be silly. Do what you need to really release and relax.”

“Thank You Fairies”
I have found that just knowing the larger energy that we are working within can make it easier to operate within it. I hope this helps you find what you need in this moment for your soul.

A Great Message for the New Year ~ An excerpt from the book

I am working again on my book The Fairies and Me and came across this channeling. I felt like it would be helpful to many at this time.

“Today is the day you can stop living in fear. You do not have to believe that the world is dying or that everything is irreversible. Believe in the power of humans, Fairies, angels, bees, cats, dogs, whales, trees, flowers, fruit, aliens, dragons, crystals, dirt, stones, and all energies that are working towards the wholeness of this place you call Earth. The rebalance has already begun. Find the balance in you and let it shine out spilling deep into the earth, radiating out over the planet, up into the cosmos, and through all realms and all dimensions. We love you. We love your planet. We love all the amazing natural energies there. Join us in love. Open your heart

There are many of you who think it is unsafe to open your heart all the way; that this will make you vulnerable, weak, and open for attack, disappointment, and hurt. That is because you think opening your heart is like opening the door to a big empty house. NO! Opening your heart is like busting open a dam allowing the river to flow and flood where it has been drought. The power of love flowing from you when your heart is open is like a Giant waterfall spilling out and joining ‘The One’. There is no need to guard and protect when you are in that space of true powerful love. This is not just romantic love, but the love for life, the universe, the planet, and EVERYTHING. When you open your heart you explode with love, sending it into, and all over, everything around you. That is what you fear, not the vulnerability but the power. It is the uncontrollable wave that takes you over and forces you to crack open and release all those broken bits. Then you will be in love, then you will be in your wholeness, and then what will you do? What will you do? Will you embrace this amazing power that resides in you? Or will you keep running? Are you looking for Freedom?

Freedom is often misunderstood. People often see freedom as basically nothingness. This vast empty space that you fly along. But that is not freedom. Freedom is about being in your power, about stepping forward and not feeling the connection and ties to anyone. It is having pure motives and clear integrity. Freedom is knowing that you are speaking the truth. Knowing, and totally confident in yourself, and your knowing, and in the expression of who you are. Once you surrender your judgments, you surrender your insecurities, when you surrender your need to be in control of your life, when you surrender what you think you need and you release any preconceived ideas about yourself and the world; then you truly move into freedom. Being able to start each day as if it is the first one you have lived; seeing the magic and wonder of every miracle that surrounds you on the planet, seeing the gift in every person, that is to know freedom. Freedom does not come with something you gain. Freedom comes in letting go of it all, but not letting go of it all into nothingness; letting go of it all so you are light enough to be totally who you are and step forward. So embrace your freedom. Surrender all that you no longer need: everything that is not helping you or serving you at this time. Feel the freedom of releasing it all and being who you are.” – The Fairies